Invincible
by elenilote
Summary: Trilogy of stories depicting the romance between Garrett and Fenris.
1. Shirtless on Sundermount

It was midsummer and the hottest day of the year so far. Merrill had invited everyone for some obscure Dalish celebration with her clan up at Sundermount. Even Fenris had relented in the face of Garrett's pleading and joined them.

A veritable feast was laid out on the grass; there were fruits and berries, sweet pastries and wines enough for everyone and more. A large bonfire was laid out ready to be lit at dusk. Garrett was enjoying this, sitting in bright sunshine with his arm around Fenris's waist and the elf's head laid on his shoulder. It was a source of wonder to Garrett that Fenris had begun to accept displays of affection in public, though he was careful not to make comments about it in fear of making him bolt again.

The midday sun was making everyone hot and one by one his companions started to shed their clothing. Isabela, of course, had no shame and in no time at all she was down to her shift; Carver was failing to keep his eyes away from her assets. Sebastian wore his usual frown of disapproval but did remove his armour. Fenris had foregone his usual breastplate and gauntlets and wore instead the linen shirt and doeskin trousers that he'd worn more than usual since Garrett mentioned he liked them.

Garrett had never thought of himself as attractive. He had never been quite as tall or muscular or strong as Carver, nor slender and lithe like Bethany. He was just...average. Carver was the one the girls liked; Garrett had his share of attention from other boys if he wanted, but no one ever said he was beautiful. Sure, Anders had flirted with him from the start, but he did that with everyone.

But he was really getting awkwardly hot, and the shirt was clinging to him in the most unpleasant way. So he stood up and unlaced his shirt and shrugged it off, it landed on the grass at his feet. He was completely unprepared for his companions' reactions.  
>Isabela whistled in the most inappropriate way that only she knew how.<p>

"Whoa, Hawke! You have been holding out on us, sweet thing. If I'd known what you were hiding under that shirt of yours, I would have tried harder to bed you!"

Garrett was blushing, never had he felt so embarrassed! Isabela alone would have been bad enough but even Anders was appraising him openly, raising one well-groomed eyebrow as his gaze travelled lower to Garrett's stomach.

"Ooh, Hawke! You are very handsome, you should not wear a shirt more often!"

_Merrill. Trust her to just blurt things out._ This was just getting worse. Garrett was about to reach for his shirt to put it on again, when a hand on his wrist stopped him. Fenris.

"Avert your eyes, Abomination. Isabela – just... shut up will you!"

Fenris took Garrett's hand and as good as dragged him away from the others to a little meadow by the lake. Garrett was feeling anxious by now, unsure how he had offended Fenris.

They stopped in the middle of the little clearing, Fenris let go of Garrett and started pacing restlessly about. Garrett was waiting for the inevitable lecture on whatever he'd done this time to offend, but was stunned as instead Fenris turned around and pulled him into a ferocious kiss. He could not help but to yield into that kiss, it was delicious and heady and everything he liked, but all too soon Fenris pulled away.

"Do you enjoy causing me discomfort? Does it excite you to see the Abomination eat you with his eyes?"

"Wh...what? Anders? Maker, no...nothing like that!"

"Then why do you just stand there blushing like a virgin and display yourself so wantonly? You are mine now, you should not show yourself so to others."

_You are mine now._  
>The words rang like a bell in Garrett's mind. Fenris had never commented on their relationship other than say he loved Garrett. He felt himself blushing again. <em>Stop it Garrett! You are not a teenager on his first date!<em>

Fenris pulled him into a fierce embrace.

"I do think you are gorgeous, Garrett Hawke. Don't ever doubt that I love you. I realize now that I should make it clear to others as well. You are mine and I am yours. I will make sure everyone knows this."


	2. Ink

_Why did I agree to this again? Oh yeah, because I love that damnable elf and I cannot refuse him!_

Garrett went through the conversation they'd had, over and over, trying to find a loophole, anything that would give him a way out. And found none.

He was nervous, and when he was nervous he paced. Carver was always bragging how "only real men have tattoos, those that can take the pain", the implication that Garrett was not one implicit in the tone.

"Garrett. Stop that. You are only making yourself ill. I promise it will be over quickly and will not hurt nearly as much as you think it will."  
>Fenris was exasperated with him; it was clear from his tone.<p>

Garrett stopped his pacing and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down.

_I can do this, I can do this. If Fenris could take getting that lyrium branded into his veins, surely I can handle_ this?

"Okay. I think… I _am_ ready."

Fenris sat in a chair by the bed and across from him on the little table was a pot of special ink, a jar of healing salve, and a long, sharp needle; a bowl of water and a stack of linen cloths they'd stolen from Anders earlier in the day. Garrett took a deep breath and lay down on the bed. His heart beat still a little too fast, and he gripped the edge of the bed in preparation for the pain he was sure would come.

"Dearest." Fenris's tone was gentle, the endearment so unexpected that it made Garrett's heart skip a beat. "Trust me. You know that I love you and only want what's best for you."

He reached for Garrett's trembling hand, turned it so that the underside of the wrist faced up and pinned it to the table. With his free hand, Fenris took the needle and dipped it in the ink. He smiled up at Garrett to reassure him and then pressed the needle down on the wrist and drew the first line.

Garrett almost jumped out of his skin at the first contact of the needle against his wrist, even before it broke the skin. He tensed and sucked in a sharp breath through gritted teeth at the first line - it hurt, Maker did it hurt. Nevertheless, he was determined to be brave - he had asked for this.

After a while, the pain receded and instead changed into something akin to numbness. Curious and emboldened by the lack of hurt, he risked a look at his wrist to see what exactly Fenris had drawn upon him. At first glance, it looked awful - an inky, bloody mess. As he looked closer, Garrett began to see the shapes forming under Fenris's steady hand. They looked rather like runes, all tied together to form a string that stretched across the underside of his left wrist. As he watched, Fenris stopped for a moment to wipe the area clean with a wet cloth, the feel of cool water on tender skin felt so good. Fenris looked up at him, flashed an impish smile, gripped Garrett's wrist even tighter and continued the design on the delicate skin just above the bone.

"Fuck! Maker's fucking balls, Fenris... _Ouch_, that hurt! _Ow_!"

Where before the lines of the needle had felt like scratches from a cat's claw, now they felt like knife tracks across his skin. With his free hand Garrett gripped the edge of the bed hard enough that he would have to look for splinters later. He felt tears in his eyes and bit hard on his lip to stifle a sob.

_I will not cry!_

And then, it was done.

Fenris inspected his work, then gathered up the cloth and cleaned up all that remained of the bloody, inky ooze on Garrett's wrist. He then took up a small pot of salve and spread it with gentle fingers over the tender flesh. With great care, he wrapped the sore flesh in a thin layer of bandage and pressed a small kiss on Garrett's palm in silent apology. Sure, Garrett could have just Healed the damage but Fenris had explained that letting the wounds heal on their own was part of the experience and maybe it might even teach Garrett some patience.

"There, love. Now everyone will look at this and see that you are mine and mine alone. Now, the other one - did you want me to do that now as well?"

The 'other one' was to be their entwined initials, tattooed onto Garrett's hip. He had asked Fenris for this particular design - something private, something only the two of them would ever see.

_Fuck. Forgot about that. I will never have the courage to do this again if I chicken out now! And I can't use magic to heal the pain, I promised I wouldn't._

"Yes, please. I- I don't think I would have the nerve to do this on another day."

Fenris smiled at his newfound bravery and leaned forward to place a tender kiss on bruised lips. His long fingers carded through the unruly black hair in an attempt to soothe away Garrett's anxiety. With a smile, Fenris pulled away and pushed him back onto the bed.

Garrett tugged his trousers a little lower on his hips, to give Fenris better access to the area above the bone that he had chosen for the tattoo. His lover's fingers were tender and the feel of cool water on his heated skin made him shiver. This time he was prepared for the sensation of the needle breaking his skin and although it still hurt, at least he was not crying.

Garrett propped up on his elbows in an effort to better see how the design looked. Fenris was bent over him and the elf's white hair fell to his eyes in the most delicious way and Garrett longed to push it back. Yet, he stayed his hand for fear of disturbing the drawing. All the while, he watched, fascinated as first his own and then Fenris's initial appeared on his skin and how under Fenris's skilled hands the two entwined.

"Fenris -_Ow_! So, where did you learn to do this sort of thing? Ow… _ouch_! Fuck that _hurts_!"

He could see that Fenris tried - and not quite succeeded - to hide a smile at his loss of control, Garrett rarely swore at all, let alone in such uncontrollable manner!

"Danarius had many uses for his favourite slave. I myself cannot be tattooed in the conventional manner as the process would interfere with the lyrium branded into me. However, Danarius enjoyed marking his other slaves. I was the one chosen for the task and have performed this ritual many times over. Though never for someone I cared for, or drawn a design that had any meaning beyond the obvious."

Fenris's tone was matter-of-fact, but the meaning behind the words made Garrett reel. He felt his breath catch as he struggled for words to say.

"You mean… people were tattooed because they were _property_? Is that what you are doing? You're marking me because you _own me_?" His voice wavered a bit at the last part, unsure how he felt about the whole thing now.

Fenris stopped and looked up at him, a soft expression in the striking green eyes.

"Garrett. You misunderstand me. I was not joking when I said I want everyone to know you are mine, but the drawings are not just a mark of ownership. That you trust me and freely offer your skin for me to mark means more than any words. I have nothing else to give you, no lovers' token for you to carry, no favour to wrap around your wrist. And maybe, just maybe the runes on your wrist will keep you safe from harm when I am not with you."

His words were met with silence. When Garrett could not stand the intensity in Fenris's eyes any longer, he lowered his gaze and stammered an apology.

"I'm sorry, love… I-I didn't mean…I just wanted… I didn't realise - I'm sorry."

Fenris nodded at that but said nothing in response. Instead, he bent down again and resumed his work. Meanwhile Garrett screwed his eyes closed, rested his head back against the headboard and swore to himself.

_You moron! This is the sort of thing that drove him away the first time. You've only gone and fucking ruined it again!_

His chest felt too tight and his breath caught in his throat. He wanted to cry; from the pain, the shame and the fear that he had driven Fenris away. Garrett let out a sigh of relief as Fenris finished and Garrett felt the cool touch of wet cloth on his skin and once more, the tender fingers spread the soothing balm. At a murmur from Fenris, he lifted his hips to allow him to wrap the bandage around him but did not open his eyes.

Done, Fenris stood up with a sigh and sat on the bed. His hands traced an abstract pattern on Garrett's chest as he rested there, silent for what seemed like an eternity. Garrett felt tense and uncomfortable and found it impossible to relax, let alone open his eyes and face Fenris.

"I'm sorry I left you. I'm sorry I never explained what I felt for you. And most of all, I'm so, so sorry that I have made you doubt me. Garrett, I will never leave you again, how could I when you are everything I need. Look at me, please."

Garrett could not stop the tears then. The apology and the gentle, regretful tone in which it was delivered proved just too much. Overwhelmed, he flung his arms around the elf and buried his face in the crook of his lover's neck.

"I have been so afraid that I would say or do something to make you go away again. I didn't realise how much it meant to you to draw the markings on me. Oh Maker, I feel so stupid for crying…"

Fenris let out a soft laugh and held him, tight against his chest.

"No need to apologise for that. If it means spontaneous displays of affection then by all means, cry all you want. But, I believe you are in need of something to eat, wait here - I'll be back soon."

Garrett settled back down to wait for Fenris's return. The pain on his wrist had settled down to a dull throb, but his hip was still very sore and he thought he could see blood under the bandage. Regardless, he felt better knowing that Fenris was serious about him, that the tattoos were not just a simple brand of ownership - they meant as much to Fenris as they did to him.

Fenris returned after a short time with a plate of sandwiches and a carafe of their favourite honey wine. Garrett was surprised to find that he was ravenous and wolfed down most of the sandwiches and the wine before he even noticed. Once satisfied, he pushed the plate aside and wriggled to make himself more comfortable on the bed.

"Sleep would be so lovely right now. Do you think we would be missed for a couple of hours?" he asked, shy all of a sudden. Fenris smiled, kissed him in reply and settled on the bed next to him.

Garrett drifted off to sleep with Fenris's arms wrapped around him, comforted by the knowledge that he would never again wake up alone.


	3. Solace

Fenris woke up with a start, his heart pounding and breath coming in fast, shallow gasps, his cheeks wet from tears.

_Another nightmare - I thought I would be free of them with Danarius dead!_

He shivered, chilled from more than just the cold and curled up tighter under the sheet in an effort to keep warm. He frowned, trying to remember what the nightmare was. It had involved Danarius, that much was obvious - all his nightmares revolved around the magister. Fenris closed his eyes and _remembered_.

_Danarius. As he had been, less than a week ago when they had encountered him at the Hanged Man. His presence was menacing, threatening in the room, he taunted, challenged Garrett for Fenris's ownership. Garrett, so naïve in the ways of the Magisters, always imagined others were as honourable as him._

_Not Danarius._

_He attacked, giving Garrett and the others no time to prepare. A fight broke out and overwhelmed Fenris with wave upon wave of demons and abominations. He couldn't see beyond the enemies which surrounded him._

_Danarius's manical cackle blocked out all else and his magic pulled at Fenris with a near-irresistible call. Then, the demons vanished all at once and silence permeated the room. Fenris stumbled to his feet and surveyed the bloodbath surrounding him._

_Dead._

_The dead lay everywhere, sprawled out in every direction. Varric and Sebastian – both motionless, their weapons fallen from their hands. In a panic, he spun around to find Garrett - bruised, bloody, and drained of magic - on his knees before Danarius, the Magister's hand around his throat.. Danarius looked straight at Fenris, pure evil in his eyes. The Magister twisted his hand and with a sickening crack, Garrett slumped to the floor._

_Words could not define the hopelessness that filled Fenris's heart as he fell to his knees and screamed -_

It was then when he woke up, his throat dry and raw and his heart pounding.

Of course, it did not happen like that - they took Danarius by surprise. Garrett had screamed his defiance at Danarius with such force it made Fenris pause in shock. With Sebastian and Varric's deadly skills with their bows and Garrett's unerring aim with his magic, Fenris proceeded to make quick work of his former Master and his minions.

Fenris had felt free. For the first time in his life, he did not need to be afraid. He had declined Garrett's offer to stay the night at the Hawke mansion. Instead he'd chosen to spend the evening getting drunk on the last of the wine from Danarius's wine cellar.

With a heavy sigh, Fenris sat up on the bed, wrapped the sheet tighter around himself and stood up. The stone floor felt cold under his bare feet, the layers of dust billowed around him as he made his way through to the landing outside his bedroom. It was dark outside, no moonlight shone through the broken windows of his bedroom but out here, on the landing, he could see a sliver of grey from the hole in the roof. All around, the shadows around him appeared etched out in sharp relief.

Garrett, dead because Fenris was unable to protect him. Fenris felt his heart constrict in his chest and his breath hitched at the thought. He gripped the railing tight with one hand without even noticing.

What had Garrett said, more than once?

_"Why do you not fix the place up Fenris, at least a little? Why do you insist on living in a ruined mansion full of old bones and broken glass? And would you at least stay until the morning, please? Why do you never sleep here?"_

He did not - could not - tell Garrett that the reason he did not clean the mansion was that if he did, it would become a burden. At least if he kept it as he found it, he could pretend it was not really his, that he could just take up and leave at a moment's notice. As to why he did not stay until the morning... to stay awake was to be watchful - it meant the difference between being alive and being dead when you were a slave. Even when Garrett came to him, Fenris would stay awake while the other slept. He would sleep later, when Garrett was gone and the door locked behind him.

Fenris paused.

_But I am no longer a slave. Danarius is dead, Garrett killed him. Why did he do it? I do not need him to protect me; I am the one who should be protecting him!_

The sharp pain of a splinter dug into his palm shook Fenris from his recollections. He lifted his hand and looked aghast as the blood welled in the ugly gash on his palm.

"Garrett-"

Fenris stopped mid-sentence - he had forgotten for a moment that he was alone.

_If I hadn't insisted on going home tonight, Garrett would have been here, with that worried frown creasing his forehead. He would have insisted that I allow him to clean and bandage the wound at once, always mindful that I do not like magic used on me unless absolutely necessary. Then again, this would never have happened there since Bodahn keeps everything in such a pristine condition._

A sudden dizziness made him stagger and fall against the railing.

When was the last time he ate? Yesterday - no, two days ago now as he had declined Garrett's kind offer for supper the night before. His pride had stopped him from accepting the gesture, as that would have meant admitting that he had not thought to buy any provisions at the market earlier.

_Garrett is forever insisting that I eat more. But I do not want his pity, or his charity. I am a free man, I can provide for myself!_

But then Fenris remembered the anxious tone of Garrett's query last night. He thought back to all the other times the mage had insisted he stay for a meal, it had been more frequent since his mother died in that horrible incident with the deranged blood mage.

_Why is his care and worrying so difficult for me to accept? I am quick to admonish him about his insecurities about my affections but when the situation is reversed I… I find it difficult to take._

Fenris felt off-balance and unsettled as he turned and shuffled his way back to the bedroom. Meanwhile, he toyed with an idea – drink more wine and hope that sleep found him, this time without nightmares. He stopped at the sight of his rickety little cot in the corner of the room.

He did not like asking Garrett to share his small bed. Of course, it _did_ happen... sometimes, but more often than not they spent their nights in Garrett's large four-poster bed. It was wide enough for three people to sleep in comfort and Fenris enjoyed the room it allowed for experimentation. He had been by no means experienced in the physical aspect of love and was hesitant to give in to his desire for Garrett. To his relief, Fenris found Garrett to be even more inexperienced in the way of things and their first night together had been wonderful beyond anything he had dreamt of.

_But I almost ruined the whole thing then. I did not deserve him then. I am not certain that I do even now. Why did he take me back? What does Garrett see in me to make him want me? I have told him I will not leave him again, why does he not believe me?_

Fenris sat down on his bed, pulled his knees up and wrapped the ragged sheet around him once more for a semblance of warmth. He did not like the direction his thoughts took him. There was something…lurking, just out of reach of his thoughts, some powerful insight that he was supposed to reach. But it he could not quite reach it - yet. He dug idly at the splinter embedded in his palm and after a while managed to pull it free. He tore a strip off the sheet on the bed and wrapped it around his hand to stem the blood.

Fenris dropped his head between his knees with an exhausted sigh. He had never imagined that freedom would bring with it so many new problems. He could not quite understand the feelings the dream had brought. Why was he so troubled? It was only a dream after all, it was not real.

And then it struck him: Just the _thought_ of losing Garrett was terrifying!

_I believe I would not be able to live without him. I…I do not wish to be apart from him yet I persist. What a fool I am!_

Fenris stood up and pulled a shirt over his head. He debated for a moment whether or not to wear his armour - he was not sure if things would go as planned. With a resigned sigh, he fished around the room for the pieces of his armour and buckled it on. As he searched for his sword, he took a final look around him.

_I have precious little to show for my existence. A suit of armour, a sword. Spare clothes and some cups for my wine - yet none of these I hold so dear that I wouldn't leave each and everyone of them behind in a heartbeat._

Fenris stepped out onto the street, all of Hightown quiet as he made his way towards the Hawke estate. In the early hours before dawn, he was grateful for the silence - an elf living outside the alienage was enough of an oddity during the daytime that people commented as he passed by.

He passed through Hightown in short order and despite the nerves, his strides were steady. It was not long before he found himself standing outside the mansion. Its windows were dark and forbidding, only a single small lantern burned above the door - a concession to Garrett's somewhat irrational fear of the dark. Fenris paused as he stared at the sturdy oak door, hesitant for a moment. He knew it was locked, but he had a key - Garrett had given him one long ago, though he rarely used it.

_"I want you to be able to come and go as you please, this is as much your home as mine."_

Fenris could count on one hand the times before when he has let himself in, it always felt like trespassing. His hand shook a bit when unlocking the door and he felt his nerves taking over and almost backed off.

_No. I have come this far, I will do this. I will NOT back away._

Fenris managed to open the door at last and stepped into the foyer. He relished in the texture of polished wood under his bare feet as he moved in silence through to the house proper. He paused by the great hearth in the hall where the fire burned low. He reached for the poker and stirred the embers to coax the flames back into life. Replacing the poker, he stood still for a moment, soaking in the warmth into his chilled bones.

With a satisfied sigh, Fenris turned and made his way up the main staircase, his hand tracing the smooth surface of the banister. The soft carpet underfoot was warm and the sensation helped to alleviate some of the nervousness he felt. Still, by the time he was standing outside the door to Garrett's bedroom, his heart pounded in his chest and he found it difficult to breathe.

_What if - ? No... I will not think of that. I want to do this right._

Careful to keep quiet in case Garrett was not asleep after all, Fenris opened the door and slipped into the room. Inside, it was dark and cool and the smell of lavender wafted in the air to fill his nose. It had been Leandra's favourite fragrance and Garrett insisted on keeping small bundles of the herb in his bedroom. Fenris had come to love the lingering smell on his lover and how his own skin retained the scent long after their lovemaking.

Awestruck, Fenris's breath caught in his throat at the sight before him.

A faint sliver of moonlight shone from the window high on the wall, and lit Garrett's pale skin with an unearthly glow. For only a brief moment, he felt a surge of panic - was something wrong with Garrett? Then he saw the steady rise and fall of the other's chest and exhaled, his shoulders sagged with relief.

_He is so beautiful. That skin is so pale, no matter he spends all his time outdoors, he never tans._

Fenris took a hesitant step towards the bed, paused for a moment and then a few more until he stood right next to it. Garrett had pushed the sheet off him and as was his want, slept clad only in his smallclothes. Fenris smiled at the sight, no matter how cold the room, at some point in the night Garrett would kick off the covers and sleep on top of them.

He knelt by the side of the bed and carded his fingers through the dark locks fanned out on the pillow. Garrett's hair was unruly at best and Fenris had taken it upon himself to smooth it to at least a semblance of order when they were out in public. He had thought that humans' hair would be coarse and thick, but Garrett's was as soft and fine as spider's silk and Fenris loved the way it felt in his hands.

"I want to stay with you and watch over you while you sleep. I want to be here when you wake up and fall asleep with you next to me. I…I want to bathe with you and eat supper with you every night. I want you to be happy; I want you to feel safe. I…I could not live without you."

Fenris's voice cracked on the last word and he lost the ability to continue. He stood up and unstrapped his sword and laid it against the wall. He proceeded to undo his armour until he was standing in nothing but his breeches. Then he walked to the other side of the bed and climbed on the bed next to the sleeping man.

_I love to watch you sleeping. You are so beautiful, so at peace like this._

He scooted closer and wrapped his arms around Garrett and then buried his face in the crook of his lover's neck.

"Fenris?" Garrett queried in a sleepy voice.

"Shh, love. Go back to sleep, I will be here when you wake up, I promise."

He closed his eyes and whispered a quiet thank-you to whatever gods had brought this man into his life. He'd never imagined he would find someone who would desire and accept him without wanting to change him. He fell asleep with Garrett snuggled tight against his chest, feeling safe and comfortable.

Fenris later awoke with the first rays of sunlight in his eyes. When he opened them, he stared into a pair of brown eyes framed by a fringe of shaggy black hair. _Garrett_.

"Good morning, love. I watched you while you slept. Did you know you smile in your sleep? Please let me heal that wound on your hand? Oh, and breakfast is ready downstairs, will you have some with me?"

Garrett's tone was hopeful, if fragile, as though he doubted that his invitation would be accepted.

Fenris reached out a hand to brush an errant strand of ebony hair behind a round ear.

"Yes, Garrett. I will. Then you and I shall have a discussion."


End file.
